Robin Hood: Men in Tights an XMen Play
by GambitLover
Summary: An Event is coming up and what happens when the x-men starts a play?
1. Default Chapter

Title: X-men Play: Robin Hood (the comedy version: men in tights)   
Author: Melody  
Email: m_Buska@yahoo.com  
Rating: PG-13

Feedback: but of course I need to know how funny this is  
Warnings: extremely funny to laugh your pants off and the ideal of how guys will look in this  
Archive: don't really own this unless I really want to lose a lot of money due to the fact that they'll sue me so to play it save I don't own Nada, *nothing* just that I made up the story that's it…  
Summary: The X-men as well as the guys are forced to participate in a local charity play! Unfortunately it comes with tights I tell you

Author Notes: ok my grammar needs some work… and also that only Logan calls Rogue Marie so you know when she's with her friends or anybody else and when she's with Logan! dude this inspired me by the movie "Robin Hood: Men in Tights"

Cast:

     Wolverine/Logan .... Robin Hood 

Cyclops/Scott.... Prince John 

Gambit/Remy.... Mervin, Sheriff of Rottingham 

Rogue/Marie .... Maid Marian 

Iceman/Bobby.... Blinkin 

Pyro/St. john.... Ahchoo 

Dr. Grey/Jean .... Broomhilde 

Iceman/Bobby .... Will Scarlet O'Hara  

Professor Xavior .... King Richard 

Beast/Hank .... Rabbi Tuckman

Director: Jubilee

Costume designer: Kitty  
  
  


Well that's most of the listing of the characters

'  '-Means thoughts

Midsummer Intro:

The silent is swept away by the planning of thus so-called charity event. Everyone is sitting at the table trying to figure out what kind of entertainment they should do. Every season in every year there is this tradition to where the x-men set up a charity event for the little kids at Mutant High. The older kids (graduated teens who some are on the junior x-men and others on the X-men team) and the adults (some are teachers some are x-men and others are both) must participate in this charity event or Xavier will do something that will make them regret it.

"Does anyone have any idea on what we should do for this upcoming charity entertainment event?" Asked Xavier.

"How about a play? Not like those boring plays but a comedy that has action but not too violent and some romance but not too mushy?" suggested Kitty.

"That is a marvelous suggestion, Kitty!" Said Rogue.

"Now what would be a great play?" said Jubilee. Turning to the television, she came upon a movie. Robin Hood: Men in Tights. "That's it! Robin Hood: Men in Tights!" "It would be so hilarious and fun for adults and kids to enjoy"

"Oh no you're not going to have us wear tights! Fuck no I wouldn't be caught dead in tights! I don't even think that any guys here would want to wear tights, well except for Scooter here since you know how pansy he is," Logan chuckled on the Idea of Scooter wearing tights.

"Very funny, Wolfy, just so you know that if I have to wear tights so will you! And if you think I look funny in tights just wait till we see you! A hairy wolf in tights!" Argued Scott.

"Oh great here it goes again, will you stop it both of you! Seriously you act like bunch of teenagers even Bobby and John act like that!" Jean yelled.

"Hey!" both John and Bobby reacted at the same time acting as if they were insulted.

"Ahem, I think it's a good idea that we do this play and just so all of you know that you all have to take part of this play no matter what! Jubilee, you will be the director and in charge of the play and Kitty sensing your fashion expertise you will be costume designer! I will even take part of this play myself so that it is fair! Everyone understand that?" said Xavier.

"Yeah whatever."

"Cool!"

"I'm down."

"Grr (grunted most likely it's a yeah)"

"Fine."

"Very well then, Jubilee, I suggested that you get this play right away!" Exit Xavier while everyone was too busy thinking about the play.

Meanwhile…

Jubilee, Rogue, and Kitty were in their room to discuss the play.

"Oooh this will be so great and so funny, I can't wait till I pick who's playing who!" Jubilee said excitingly.

"I know this will so cool, I can't wait till I design the outfits they're gonna be marvelous." Said Kitty

"Ah know, that was a great suggestion on picking the play, Jubes!" Rogue said while thinking how Logan looks in tights! She chuckled on the idea of Wolverine in tights!

"Oooh, Rogue, you should play Maid Marian and Logan should play Robin Hood! Since you have control over your skin you get to kiss him!" Suggested Kitty

"Oh that's it chicka, it's official, you will play Maid Marian and Robin Hood will be Logan. Plus while you and Logan are off to rehearse together, things will probably get hot. Besides by the end of the play you'll both know how you both feel about each other!" Said Jubes.

"NOOOOOO…that would be embarrassing for me, please, Jubes, don't make do that!" 'Although kissing him won't be embarrassing wait no focus, Rogue' Rogue said.

"Nope, it's official now, if you excuse me I have to do the script and pick who's playing who! Later, chickas." And with that Jubilee left the room.

Kitty however said that she had to go and get some materials and work on the costumes and told Rogue that she'll see her later!

So with that, Rogue was by herself with the thoughts on how she was going to play Maid Marian without having Logan sense her true feelings.

Thinking back, Logan just came back a month ago after 3 years he's been gone and since then Marie and Logan have been spending a lot of time together but only just as friends. She wonders how it would be if it were something more than friendship between Logan and her. 

'Oh get a grip, Rogue, ahll he sees in you is just nothing more of a friend,' sighed Rogue thoughtfully.

Getting herself together she walked out of her room and made her way through the hall passing Logan's room.

"Hey, Marie, going somewhere?" Logan said as she walked past his room.

"Oh hey, Logan, no ah was just going to get something to eat, whatcha doing?" asked Marie.

"Nothing just going to watch the hockey game tonight, wanna join me?" said Logan.

"Shure, I'll just go get some refreshments and some snacks ok?" 

"Ok, oh hey, Marie, get some beers while you're at it, k?" 

"Ok be right back!" With that Marie made her way down to the kitchen.

[Logan's Room]

"Ok, Ahm back," as Marie entered Logan's room. 

"Finally thought I have to come get you seeing how you took so long getting here."

"Hey ah waz getting the refreshments, there's just so much to carry."

With that Marie set herself against the bed and gave the snacks and beer to Logan.

"So who's playing against who?" asked Marie while she stuffed herself with Ruffles chips!

"Red Wings Vs. Maple Leafs, American verses Canadian!"

"Oh ah hope the Red Wings the Maple Leafs."

"Yeah I doubt it, oh hey, Marie, do you know who's playing who for the play?" Logan asked while sipping at his beer.

'Knowing that it would be humiliating to tell him that he is Robin Hood while I'm Maid Marian, I could die of embarrassment. So I'll just play it cool!' Marie thought.

"Well…um…she did say like who she thinks should play who, but knowing Jubes you know she's very picky so ah don't know exactly who's who," Marie said.

"Hmm…I hope she doesn't make me Robin Hood or any of the guys who have to wear tights!" 

"Oh, Logan, everyone has to wear tights and beside if they didn't wear tights then how will they sing the song 'We're Men in Tights'? They're not going to sing we're men in pants are they? Wouldn't sound right." Said Marie.

"WHAT! We have to sing too? Aww fuck, I'm not gonna be singing in no damn play, hell no! I don't care what Xavier says there is no way I'm participating in a goddamn play! Grrrr," Logan almost yelled.

And with that Marie just watched the hockey game not trying to upset Logan because he will have no choice but participate in the play but oh well. 

After Marie left Logan's room that night with the Red Wings winning, of course, she said goodnight and headed towards her room. She entered her room and sure enough was Jubilee and Kitty.

"Hey Chicka, did you have fun at Wolvie's room? Oh did you tell him that he was Robin Hood?" snickered Jubilee

"Um…ah don't know if he'll even do it, but knowing what the professor's gonna do there's no way he'll back down! Plus he doesn't know who he's playing. Heck he didn't even know that this was also a musical! But it will be funny though!" Rogue said.

"Well he'll find out tomorrow because I scheduled with the professor a rehearsal!" said Jubilee

And with that all three of them went to sleep waiting till the next day of rehearsal.


	2. The Rehearsal

Title: X-men Play: Robin Hood (the comedy version: men in tights) 2/?  
Author: Melody   
Email: m_buska@yahoo.com  
Rating: PG-13

Series: 1/?  
Feedback: but of course I need to know how funny this is  
Warnings: extremely funny to laugh your pants off and the ideal of how guys will look in this

Archive: sure just let me know where it is!   
Disclaimer: don't really own this unless I really want to lose a lot of money due to the fact that they'll sue me so to play it save I don't own Nada, ***nothing*** just that I made up the story that's it…   
Summary: The X-men are rehearsing for the play and things get hot while Logan and Marie rehearse the kissing part! Who hoooo

Author Notes: ok my grammar needs some work… and also that only Logan calls Rogue Marie so you know when she's with her friends or anybody else and when she's with Logan! dude this inspired me by the movie "Robin Hood: Men in Tights"

Cast:

     Wolverine/Logan .... Robin Hood 

Cyclops/Scott.... Prince John 

Gambit/Remy.... Mervin, Sheriff of Rottingham 

Rogue/Marie .... Maid Marian 

Iceman/Bobby.... Blinkin 

Spikes/Reggie.... Ahchoo 

Storm/Ororo.... Broomhilde 

Iceman/Bobby .... Will Scarlet O'Hara  

Professor Xavior .... King Richard 

Beast/Hank .... Rabbi Tuckman

Director: Jubilee

Costume designer: Kitty  
  


Well that's most of the listing of the characters

'  '-Means thoughts

Rehearsing Area

"I can't believe fucking Chuck made me be here! I can't Fucking believe it! After I swore at him refused be a part of this fucking damn play!" complained Logan.

"Well Logan, he did warn you and well you should have taken his word for it because when he's serious about something, well he's serious." Said Marie.

"Ok everyone take your seat, and we will announce who plays who in this part, now I have been thinking about this and I don't want any complains or else I will make you VERY VERY sorry!" exclaimed Jubilee. "Now you have the script and I shall announce who's playing who."

"The leading Role for Robin Hood is Logan!" Said Jubilee.

"WHAT!?! Wait a minute; I am NOT going to play Robin Hood! No Fucking Way!" yelled Logan.

"Would you just shut-up Logan and let her finish who's playing who!" said Scott.

"Grrrr…"

"Ok and Maid Marian will be played by Rogue, since she has a lovely voice."

Rogue just blushed when she was told that she was playing Maid Marian, and plus that Jubilee told everyone her voice; no one ever heard her voice but her roommates.

"Oye Logan, Remy will play de Robin Hood, since he gets a kiss from chere, Rogue…" Suggested Remy.

Hearing this Logan decides to keep his role. 'There's no way is he going to get to kiss MY Marie!' Logan Thought.

"Listen bub, if you think you're going to lay your hand on her think again!" Logan said.

Rogue was all flushed realizing what Logan said. 'Does that mean what I think it means? No, Marie, he's just being the protective brother,' Rogue sighed.

"Scott-Prince John, Remy-Mervin, Sheriff of Rottingham, Bobby-Blinkin, Reggie-Ahchoo, Jean-Broomhilde and Latrine, John-Will Scarlet O'Hara, Xavier-King Richard, Hank-Rabbi Tuckman. Now most of you have two parts only because we are short of characters and you will not be in role at the same time," Jubilee said reading the names out loud.

"So when are we going to have rehearsal?" asked Reggie.

"We will have Rehearsal's two times a week as well as dress rehearsal but all of you are responsible for rehearsing with each other on your own time. We have 3 weeks till opening night so I suggest you put a lot of effort! Now lets get into vocal, now all of you have the script as well as the music lyrics." "Rogue, Logan will you please come here and sing the song "Marian"

As both Rogue and Logan got up they went to the stage area and waited patiently to sing the song.

"Ok Rogue, Logan, all you have to do is sing your parts so lets get the music into gear and listen to your voices," Jubilee said.

(music starts as Rogue sings)

Where is the one that I love most of all 

**When will I hear him call Marian, Marian**

**He is the one who can make my life whole**

Joyful forever more 

Everyone was in awe when they heard Rogue sing with such a beautiful voice while everyone was also anxiously to hear Logan sing. Logan was also stunned how bow beautiful Rogue had sung.

**Where is the maid, that I'm longing to see**

**Where can she be my sweet Marian, Marian**

**Oh when will I hold you here in my arms**

**Knowing you are my love**

"Well it seems like Logan knows how to sing no wonder he only sings in his shower…haha," snickered Kitty

Everyone was astonished how Logan and Rogue seemed to harmonize their voices together. Logan and Rogue just stared at each other until Jubilee told all the guys to come in and do the "Men in Tights" song.

"Ok guys now this is the song where you sing men in tights," Jubilee said.

"Oh hey I like this part, come on, Blinkin, side by side while we dance in our tights, hey Kitty when do we get our tights anyways?" asked John.

"You guys get it tomorrow where we'll have a dress rehearsal." Said Kitty.

"Hey John, I get to punch you! Well since Blinkin is blind, I might as well get some glasses. puts on glasses There better now!" said Bobby.

"Hey Blinkin!" Reggie Yelled.

"Did you say 'Abe Lincoln?'" Bobby said getting into his character.

Bobby heads towards where Logan was standing and starts feeling Logan's chest.

"What the hell are you doing?" growled Logan.

"Where's your boob? I read it in the script that you we're suppose to have boobs and no arms?" asked Bobby.

"Bobby, it's supposed to be a statue not Logan!" Kitty yelled across the room.

"Oh right then, easy Logan, remember that Blinkin is blind so um…I'll just get ready to sing right now," Bobby said while he ran off.

"Ok I want all the guys in here to sing and dance the song now! I don't care if you're not in this scene, this part has to do with all the guys and well since there's not that many guys here so we're gonna use all the males."

All the guys we're in their position as the music start. 
    
    **We're men... we're men in tights**
    
    **We roam around the forest looking for fights.**
    
    **We're men... we're men in tights.**
    
    **We rob from the rich and give to the poor, that's right.**
    
    "Come on guys sings and get into the grove, Logan will you stop looking like your about to kill Bobby!" yelled Jubilee
    
    **We may look like sissys, **"Except for Scott" Logan snickered.
    
    **but watch what you say or else we'll put out your lights. (bang) **Bobby punches John)
    
    **We're men... we're men in tights **
    
    **always on guard defending the peoples rights.**
    
    All the guys line up and they get ready to do the shaking dance
    
    **(Can can music)**
    
    **la la la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la la la...**

**lalalalalalala (repeat).**

While the guys are dancing, all the ladies roar into hysterical laughter. The guys look so funny as they get into the routine of the dance and looking at Logan, Bobby, and John, Reggie heads into the front of the line.
    
    **We're men..manly men**
    
    **We're men in tights, yes (with lisp)** John sings in high points
    
    **We roam around the forest looking for fights.**
    
    **We're men, we're men in tights**
    
    **We rob from the rich and give to the poor that's right.**
    
    **We may look like pansies, **"Scott that's you!" "Shut up Logan!" Scott yelled.
    
    **but don't get us wrong or else we'll put out your lights. (bang) **Bobby punches John again
    
    **We're men... we're men in tights (tight tights) **Bobby and John lifts their pants up and do a goofy dance while jumping up and down then stops and do a manly stand with their arms and hand on their hips
    
    **Always on guard defending the peoples rights**
    
    **When your in a fix just call for the men in tights.**

**We're butch. **Song end while guys poise as strong brave men

"Ah guys that waz the most funniest dance ah've seen haha!" As Rogue falls on the floor and starts laughing hard same goes for Jean and Ororo.

"Oh ok now, That's it for today! But remember that you are all responsible for rehearsing on your own time.

(Outside)

Marie is outside getting some fresh air while Logan comes out and watches Marie hum and read her lines.

"Hey, wanna rehearse together?" asked Logan.

"Um…shure but ah'm at the end right now just reading ahead that's all." Said Rogue.

Logan takes the scripts and reads where Marie stopped. He reads head to the part where Maid Marian and Robin Hood gets married and comes into the kiss. 

"Well I guess we should practice the kiss huh?" said Logan

"Um..we don't have to you know um…we could just like skip that part." Said Marie nervously.

It was night outside where the stars are out and the moon shines. "You don't want to kiss me?" asked Logan. 

"It's not that, don't you think that um…well uh.." Marie tries to speak but suddenly Logan grabs Marie a gently kisses her.. "How was that?" Logan Asked.

"I don't know, I think we need to do a retake.." Marie said. Logan kisses her again but this time with passion. "So what about that?" asked Logan. "hm…it was amazing!" said Marie.

"There you two are!" Jubilee said as she was walking towards Rogue.

"Hi Jubes, What's up?" Rogue asked.

"Kitty needs you to try on the dress that she made for you!" said Jubilee

"Ok well, Ah'll see you later Logan k! Hopefully we'll rehearse again." Rogue said as she followed Jubes out.

'Well Marie, I guess this play will be a night to remember…' Logan thought.


End file.
